Class

There is something in us which makes us believe that we belong to a particular class of people.This is ingrained within us probably because we have this habit of classifying things and unless we know we belong to a particular class we do not feel secure enough. By classifying ourselves we become predictable and our behavior assumes lack of rough edges and absence of those wonderfully delicious angularities arising out of not belonging. You know in my transactions with people I always look for the people lumped together by way of congenital classes or societal divisions behaving as though they belonged together. I do not know why, while I deal with two women I believe that both of them are together in this thing and that is, a secret bond exists between them which is apart from me and away from me. These are a secret society and a common fate binds them together excluding me from that circle. When I see two economically less privileged people dealing with me I suspect there is something between them which binds them together and I become their common foe. When I see my gardener talking to my driver outside of my transactions I begin to feel they are actually conspiring against a common enemy ,that is me. That is ridiculous and anybody who listens to this will say I am a dirty capitalist pig who is imagining things out of a class hatred borne out of an insecurity that their belongingness is supposed to evoke in me.Actually that is not the real thing .In point of fact I want those guys to stick together and my uneasiness about them is their not sticking together .I expect them to belong to the class in which my mind has slotted them in the background of their own social or intellectual class.I know that the script is already written and precious little will evolve out of the transactions apart from the most banal events in the whole drama . But the burden is so much on the mind and why the hell am I responsible for this -is a certain doubt that wracks my mind.Actually I want my microcosm to exist the way I have designed it, not the way it will evolve through several unconnected events . That means the problem lies essentially with me , my microcosm or the reflection of the world within me. I want everything to fall into place and it suits me to have these guys to belong together in a strange silky bond of friendship

Coming back to the need to belong , it bothers me no end not to belong but at the same time it bothers me equally to belong where everybody belongs. I want everything to fall into a category purely for ontology purposes because if I come across a strange thing which does not fall into a class I feel my comprehension challenged.

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